humbled.

i’m discovering how ugly my soul is when left to its own devices. i was overwhelmed in a worship set of an ordination service of all places by how much i suck. its astonishing how much i walk around assuming by default that i don’t suck. ‘i didn’t do anything blatantly wrong’ so… i must not suck. right? ….right? it’s a beautiful thing to be humbled by god. to finally catch a glimpse of his glory through my hardened heart. i’m really bad at loving people. i’m really good at pretending like i can. decent at talking and thinking about it. really good at judging other people for not. i’m really ugly on the inside.