maybe i've become cynical. [i realized the other day during a community night that i felt a disconnect. i've been learning and talking a lot about god but not talking to him. any approach to salvation, which he is playing out every day, that does not eventually become worship becomes distorted and reduced to a concept. a program. a technique. we master it and therefore control it. with intentions of worshiping together, i felt a loss of words during corporate praise and prayer. i've taken control.] all this to say, maybe the following is biased. maybe i’m cynical.
i found myself rolling my eyes at status updates that boast of, "great nights, great friends," "i love my life," "i am so lucky." [preconceived judgments possibly influence some intolerance.] i think, 'yea, so?' these sentiments in my mini-feed and twitter feel forced. seem fake. self-applauding. disconnect.
god is the source of all that is good. everything that's beautiful... wonderful. sorry, i couldn't resist. a dismaying abundance of altruistic phenomenon abides in the everyday. creation is endlessly complex. everyone can and does encounter good things in stunning and variegated ways, there's endless possibilities, literally. accordingly there’s disconnect with differing arrays of happiness. we roll our eyes, even if it's genuine from their end. rare is the discovery and connection with a kindred soul and stumbling upon such confidantes should in fact be celebrated. not everyone would delight in a rare thrift store find or the accomplishment of finishing a difficult run. to truly celebrate the good things you experience with you. to know first hand the feeling, because they’ve felt it. they make you feel like you're not the only one. cause you’re not.
i'm much more prone to comment or "like" or reply to updates concerning upsets, discouragements, sadness, injustices, hopelessness, annoyances. i can relate on a deep level more easily without preclusion. the devil’s imagination is vastly smaller than gods, not as far-reaching, his tools less reverberant. i understand human defense mechanisms, pains, the annoyances, the guilt, the same propensity to sin, same heart ache, same weaknesses, same lies. even if it's not the same circumstances, i have files and files of history of hurts i can pull from. empathize with.
it takes a lot less effort to relate the pains of being human. it takes certain skill to evoke an experience of beauty. god is too vast. ineffable. there's too big of a vocabulary to pull from. masters of written and spoken words chiefly seem to succeed when they evoke those feelings of embarrassment, pain, annoyance, hurt, abandonment. they cause you to mourn with or laugh at shared experiences, but they connect. the pains of being a human.
yes, i just blogged about status updates.
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